Sunday, 19 August 2018

Lady Cop

Oh yes. Oh-ho yes. It's Lady Cop, the Bronze Age comic that singlehandedly props up the entire internet, as blog after blog after blog chuckles about and rips apart one of the greatest What the f#%?!! comics in the entire history of, well, everything really.
What's that? You don't know about Lady Cop? Is that what's troubling you, boy?
Lady Cop was another barking mad issue of 1st Issue Special ( was it the 1st issue or the 4th issue? Who can say? ) and is an absolute treasure trove for fans of wrong-headed, crazynuts comics. I mean, you can see what normally reliable writer Bob Kaniger was going for: A girl witnesses a murder, is driven to join the police and we see her through her first couple of days, with all the variety the job entails. Add some background with a typically sexist '70's boyfriend, and it would all be perfectly fine and dandy.
The art, by Lois Lane's John Rosenberger and Vince Colletta is also perfectly acceptable ( barring one panel I'll get to in a minute ) and maybe girl readers would actually go for a police heroine, but it's in the execution where it all falls apart. There's so much craziness here, that once you've finished with how crazy this comic is, there's another whole lake of crazy to dive into. For instance:
People actually call Lady Cop Lady Cop. To her face.
One of the many exciting subplots she gets involved in is offering advice to a girl with VD.
The mysterious murderer in the cowboy boots, who's as integral to Lady Cop's origin as Joe Chill is to Batman's.... is never seen again.
Lady Cop is sexually assaulted, and escapes by kicking her assailant in the knackers.

Wait. You do have a boyfriend, right, Lady Cop? You know where a guy's nuts are? 'Cos from where I'm sitting from you've just brushed the lower part of your leg up against that perp's inner thigh.
I could go on ( and on ) about the myriad of delights to be found here, but I'll save the rest for you to discover for yourself. Except: The scene in the police academy training room with all the other inductees. Are they referred to by similar sobriquets, d'you think? Y'know, maybe there's a Brave & The Bold style team-up opportunity here.
Lady Cop with Black Lady Cop, Coloured Incorrectly Asian Lady Cop, Token Male Hispanic Cop etc etc. I'd buy that comic.

Thursday, 16 August 2018

The Silver Surfer vs. Spider-Man

John Buscema hated drawing superheroes. He also hated drawing cityscapes and people in modern dress.
You can tell, can't you?

Tuesday, 14 August 2018

A Happy Ending For The Heap

So whatever happened to Skywald's very own muck-monster, The Heap, in the end? Well, it was an open secret that editor / writer Al Hewetson hated this particular character so, after some great opening shots from Ross Andru, Mike Esposito & Tom Sutton, Archaic Al let the strip slide a bit.
Episode after episode passed by, each one more nonsensical than the last, with Al clearly writing the whole thing through gritted teeth.
But then he decided to end the serial in the most bizarre way possible. With a happy ending.
Following a story where The Heap loses all intelligence and reasoning, putting him at about the same level as Atlas' The Brute, Hewetson gave up the ghost entirely and provided the bog beast with a finale Swampy, Manny and the rest would give their right ( regrown ) arm for.
As for the poll at the end, where readers are asked to write in if they want The Heap back, well, Skywald went out of business before Al had to make good on that promise.
Which is a shame, because when he started, Heapy was a pretty great strip. Still, as I say, I don't recall any other character ever ending his series quite like this.